How do you make a corned beef on St. Paddy’s Day when you have to work and won’t get home in time to fix it? For many years Mom’s answer was the Slow Cooker. Just rush around in the morning trying not to get your professional outfit messy by wearing an apron and knowing full well that handling all this beef was going to interfere with your perfume and make you smell like meat.
Still, it was a solution. By the time the kids and husband got home, the food was laid on the table and the party was on! Including green jello with pears she thought to make the night before. The kids had green dye added to their 7 Up, Mom jokingly got Dad a six pack of Mickey’s in the big green barrel bottles.
Dad always sneered at Mom’s attempt to be cute and funny on this National Day of the Irish. “Why don’t we have Scandinavian Day?” he would ask snidely. ‘Everyone else has a day.” But he did enjoy the pickled meat with mustard and a shot or two of the hard stuff. He also really liked the brown pumpernickel bread.
One year she went full out and got funny hats to wear, a green plastic table cloth embossed with Leprechauns, and balloons. He was not amused. The following year he purposely made reservations for the whole family to go to Hawaii to try to escape the madness. Imagine his surprise when looking down off the balcony onto the pool deck, he saw that the pool had been dyed green(!) and all the staff was dressed in green outfits with the same hats that Mom had for us last year. Plus, the whole strip of Waikiki down Kalakaua Avenue smelled of boiling corned beef!
I still follow my mother’s prescription for a great fun holiday, but along with the Corned Beef, I make a hippie version of Champs for myself and those vegetarians who’d like to try it…
Champs
Six (2 Lbs.) Russet Potatoes (peeled, chopped into cubes, boiled until soft
One large white or brown Onion sliced into half moon strips
One medium green Cabbage (cored, quartered, sliced)
One pound block of firm Tofu (cubed)
Salt, Pepper, Garlic, Paprika to taste (about 1/2 teas. of each)
1/2 cup Half and Half or 1/2 cup Canned Milk
Butter (One cube… no one said this was going to be low fat)
Directions:
Peel and boil the potatoes until soft enough to mash
Drain and mash with 1/2 cube butter and Half & Half
While the potatoes are boiling…
Saute cabbage with the sliced onions in 2 Tbls. butter over medium heat
Add Tofu when the vegetables and the pan is really hot, mix in with cabbage & onion
Cover and let steam for about 8 minutes
Then add the spices. The tofu needs a direct dose of spice to have flavor.
Mix the whole lot together gently in a large attractive bowl.
Serve with the last dollop of butter melting on top.
You may be tempted to give up Corned Beef!
(First published 3/17/13)
