Musicians gossip after a gig. They all criticize the singers they work with.
“Man, she was terrible! Forgot her keys and didn’t know when to come in!”
“Ha! Nothing but “Ham Fat”…what’s the use of “Ham Fat”?
“J.A.S…Just another singer, huh?”
“Yeah, this chick is hot! But you know, she sings with her legs open?”
“No, I don’t…but hum a few bars…”
Ha! They all burst into laughter!
After the first set she wanders the bar interacting with customers, “Thanks for coming in!”
“Great to see you!”
One old gal who has been there all night is open to more conversation. She motions for the singer to come closer as she implies she has something delicate to say to her. The Old Gal is about 96 years old with dyed red hair and a sparkle in her eye. “I love your material. You sound good too, but do you have to sit there like that with your legs open?”
Now it is true. The singer does get into it. She sits for most of her set trying to conserve her energy as well as trying not to act too broad. She has a habit of going overboard, dancing and shaking her bon bons all over the place. She sits to modify her outgoing personality.
She wears slacks and a nice tunic length top to camouflage her mid life girth. She is nicely made up with appropriate hair ornaments. Meeting her for the first time off stage, you might think she is a school marm. Once on stage, she does get into it though.
She leans back and belts it out from the heart and gut. Her legs begin wagging and stomping to the beat. One leg goes up, the other leg goes out. She is dancing on the chair without getting to her feet.
Her arms wave, her face is contorted with the emotion of the song. Her voice covers the full range of human possibilities: high and sweet to low and raucous depending on the mood she is trying to impart.
She is the consummate professional, but it was true. She did sing with her legs open. That would be her new “Indian Name” she decided. Sings with Legs Open! Ha! She thought it was funny! No offense taken.
#SingsWithLegsOpen
